We've had a week from hell and to say the least, it's only Wednesday. Our darling little 3 year old found a fear. The fear of being in restraint. It all started on Saturday night, while we were in St. Augustine, about an hour from home. Sam has always been our over excitable, enthusiastic, full of energy type of child. For that, we love him dearly. However, the problem with the above traits is the ability to change. He likes what he likes, and that is it. He's gone to bed hungry numerous nights because he's not satisfied with the meal presented to him. He will kick and scream and throw up to get reaction from us and then he knows we'll feel bad for him. Ever since he was a baby he's been full of nervous energy. From taking medicine to being dropped off at daycare. There were so many challenges he presented to us....oh Sam....we love you so...
Well, he presented us with yet another parenting challenge. The fear of his car seat. In his little head, he is convinced that being in his car seat is pure torture. He's been fighting with this for days now. I do believe him, I do believe that he is afraid of restraint. The look of fear and anxiety in his eyes broke my heart. He would proclaim that he didn't want to go see his friends (he normally BEGS to see them). He would proclaim that he didn't want to go play soccer, (NEVER happens) etc. Heck, he didn't even want to go to Target....I knew something was wrong.
It's been a long hard week with him. Monday we sat outside in the car ALL day, besides lunch and naps, and we talked. Sam and I talked over and over and over about being scared and what it was that makes him scared. We talked over and over about how much I love him and how I want him to be strong and it's okay to be scared etc. He was a mess, and my heart was broken, and I was tired of cleaning up vomit.
Wednesday I decided I was done. After a heartfelt conversation with two pediatricians, I had to end this mess. I decided it was time to set my emotions aside and conquer this toddler disaster, which meant I was going to be in charge. I wasn't going to let his vomiting and violent acts of disaster control my life and he was going to have to get over it. After a Mommy throw down, strap down and buckle up war, I managed to get him in. I knew he was going to vomit, so I brought towels. I knew he was going to enter into a anxious state, so I brought his pacifier and blanket. I knew this was going to be the hardest thing I was going to have to see him through, but I just kept talking out loud about how much I loved him and I would never hurt him. Poor little Matthew just sat there and looked at me with worry. He had no idea why his older brother was so scared.
I got to the Target boutique kids in tow. He did it, with a fight of course, but he did it. He screamed all the way there and did what he did best, but regardless we were there. We meandered around the store talking to the baker, the pharmacist, the shelf stockers, the Pepsi rep, the little boys in the cart next to us, the baggier, the cashier, the cart collector, as I demanded Sam repeated, "I did it, I got in my car seat, I'm not scared anymore". Most of the people we spoke to totally understood what I was doing and played along so very well....until we got to the cart collector. He had no clue, but it was okay, because that was on our way out.
I could tell Sam was a little apprehensive about leaving the boutique and getting back in the car, but this time, he was a little bit calmer. He was very anxious to get home, but he did it. After naps, we got in the car again, a little bit better again.
WOW! I just learned a ton about parenting and the power of communication, the power of patience and the power of love. It's amazing what I've learned about my little 3 year old son, who now by the way has a raspy groggy voice. Pray for us and our ventures for tomorrow....it's been a looooonnnnngggggg week already.
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